The Prod.cast | Transcript: A Wedding and a Funeral (Post Malone AOTW)

A Wedding and a Funeral (Post Malone AOTW)

August 10, 2023 / 59:18/E112 Download MP3

Hello and welcome to the prodcast. A podcast that we talk about life, work, and occasionally music.

My name is SwitchBladesForKids and the other half of the podcast.

My name is Blake Bentley.

Hello.

How are you doing?

Right.

After this feels so much nice.

After that like, mass that we just went through like the fact that I looked over and

I was like, I'm not saying anything and there's a lot of like movement going on in my

world.

I'm like, oh my God, I'm recording you.

But like, and it was, I can't remember why I was, oh, you know what, you know, I had

that set to loot back was from that, that's how I record the Skype into the edit.

Speaking of Skype, we do have a Skype number.

If you don't know why now, it's one of our episode titles.

But if you want to jump in on our Skype, it is plus 61, 75, 64, 110, 80 so that you can

leave us a voicemail and then you can get it edited the way I edited it.

Yeah, edited it.

I'm edited it.

Oh, Blake, how the hell are you?

I'm good, man.

I'm good.

I'm vibing.

I've had my cold shower.

What was that thing you were saying about cold shower?

Something about like, cold care and stuff.

I actually do find it quite interesting.

Yeah, I like to give context.

I'll explain it quickly.

Yeah.

Apparently, cold care increases your dopamine receptors by two and a half times or something

and a natural way of doing that is submerging yourself in cold water for quite a few minutes,

so I do that.

It's quite like under 10 minutes.

It's like five minutes.

Okay, so five minutes of cold water therapy is the same as that.

Like increases your dopamine receptor, receptors by two and a half times.

There you go.

You had a long demand first of time as well, apparently.

So it gradually increases.

Yeah.

Okay, but cocaine.

Boom.

Yeah, it's like, man, 15 minutes later.

I don't know how coke feels because I don't take it.

I have it.

No matter how hard I try, I still can't get it.

I must look like a cop.

Oh, you're so funny, man.

You're like, I'm tried for so many years.

And they just don't give it to me.

They don't like the look of me.

I think I've spoken about this before.

It's like, I have no idea who to talk to.

Yeah.

You know, like, if you've ever been in a bar and you look around and you're like, who is it?

Who's the guy who's supposed to buy drugs off here and you're looking around?

Yeah.

It ever looks so normal.

It ever looks like they have a good time.

But like, you're off the vibe, right?

It was just like, everyone must be doing it then.

And I'm just here looking at everyone else.

Not enjoying the whole atmosphere.

Everyone's like, that is the undercover.

Like, as a guy, we're just like making eye contact with everything you're supposed.

Where are they?

Yeah, where are the people?

That's so funny, man.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.

So you've been getting into these cold showers, you're feeling great and you're happy to be

here.

Yeah.

That's the vibes.

Happy to be here, yeah.

How's your week been?

Good.

Because we'll get into my week.

Yes.

I think my week might take a little while, so.

Yeah, no, well, look, I'll give you this.

We played a lot of Boudre's Gate.

We streamed it.

Yeah.

It's great.

I love it.

I don't plan on stopping playing it at this point.

Obviously, it's the second day in, as of recording, because it only came out like, well,

the full release of it only came out Saturday, Thursday.

Was it Thursday?

Yeah, because we were like that.

That Thursday we were playing it and it didn't have all that updated shit.

We had that huge update.

Oh, fuck.

Five hours, six hours.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Because that's the full release.

That's so much.

That's nice and yeah.

And the full release, so we've been playing it for two nights and it's fan-buck and

tastic.

I love it.

I'm going to keep playing it.

I'll tell you what, there's some absolute moments in it.

And what I plan on doing, what I plan on doing, because of these, I've been doing nearly

three hour streams every time we do it.

What I plan on doing is making like a super cut of just the funny bits and like, you know,

the video may end up being like 30 minutes long.

There is genuinely so few amounts of time.

There's like, there's, you know, the little blocks of time where there's sort of nothing's

happening.

It's, there's so far, few and far between because there is so much dumb shit happening.

And it's so funny.

Like the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the content because she's fucking shit off.

We, we, we, we don't realize the effect we have on this world.

No.

And it's hilarious.

It's fucking funny.

You know, yeah, yeah.

You know why?

I was just thinking about it because we fucking, I was thinking about this when we played it.

We came into a town and if anyone's playing bowlers gate or fucking plans to plan a dozen

ones, spoilers, just fast forward, like, to yourself out of the car, right?

Yeah.

But we're just out.

Now, we're in your cell.

Yes.

But, but there's a town where it's like two parties are at war with each other, sort of.

It's like a cold war at the moment.

And they're sort of, there's tensions are high.

And then these four dumb idiots, the ones in town, fall into, like, fall down a fucking three-story

folk like, like, it was a pit.

It was a pit with a fucking barrel pit.

Yeah.

And then one adventurer decided to throw a bird out of wall.

It was me.

That was me.

I picked, dude, if there is an action that says throw and, and, and I was just picking, you

was picking you up for a different fact.

As soon as I figured out that I could pick you up, I'm a halfling, a little person, but

I'm also a barbarian.

And I picked up you, another halfling, and just went, "Ugh, throw you across the fucking map."

That is fucking hilarious.

The fact that I just walked into this pit and I was like, "Oh, bird, I'm going to throw

them because I've been throwing everything so far.

Pick up the bird, everyone's angry.

Throw bird at wall, bird explodes into blood.

Everyone's pissed, man."

And then we started a race war.

What happened, yeah?

We started a race war.

I think we were back through a bird.

Oh, my God.

That was so funny.

Yeah.

It's so funny, man.

The consequences of me picking up a bird, because it wasn't even the throwing action,

it was just picking it up, gripping it, in fact, with my hand.

But you were being so happy, man.

Instilled a massive town-wide riot against two different factions.

And we just were left going, "What happened?

What do we do?

And what side do we want to be on?"

And we chose the right side, I guess, or the A side.

We chose a side, and we're just looking for the consequences.

I don't know.

"Good man."

You know what?

It doesn't matter.

Because we'll go to another town where we'll create some more unrest.

That's the funny part, right?

We've started a race war.

We started and then subsequently finished a race war.

We helped the town defeat the other side, right?

And then we just kept on keeping on.

We just laughed.

Well, next town, I guess.

See you later, I guess that's all the sound I'd offer.

You know what makes me think, like, looking at that, and the fact that it was like, "Ooh,

it tensions around the rise," and then throwing a bird and then race war, and then cleaning

up, mopping up the rest, and chill out that.

And then just gone, "I thought right then," and I was like, "This isn't the main town.

This isn't like the main town at all."

Because surely they wouldn't have all of this main character sort of energy with everyone

there just absolutely tearing each other apart and then going, "All right, well, another

day, another septum sort of shit, you know?"

They just went back to and all, and everyone was talking and was like, "You were the hero

fucking blah blah."

I'm like, "Yes, I am."

In fact, yes, I did throw that bird and thought.

You could pummel it into a building fucking fellas.

It's like the witcher with the butcher of Blamekin, right?

You know, we just, we get a name from, you know, the heroes of this, you know, because

they won.

Because we killed the bad guys.

We were just there.

We instilled, but we incited the riot.

Yeah, we incited because no one actually saw what started it except us.

Yeah.

I said that like one person, and then the worst and everyone else.

Dude, it was a serious, say exactly what we did.

That's the thing.

They just pointed it and said, "They're bad."

And we had like, "I fucking did it."

Yeah, and it was like, it was from that one dude.

He's just gone, "Oh, that guy killed my bird."

"Rex, what fucking, what's fucking, what's killing man?"

And it was just like, "All right, cool, they're fucking boom boom boom."

It was great.

Fantastic stuff.

Yeah.

If this isn't enough of a reason to get this game, just for the pure fucking dumb shit that

can happen into it, that is just one thing that we did.

And I've got three hours of just straight up, even more than I've got nearly six hours of

just straight up dumb shit.

That's just, we were laughing so much, doing so much dumb shit.

Yeah.

Going to another little settlement that had been, that were under siege by like a demon.

And then we'll help you fight the demon, they're like, "We'll give you this shiny sword."

And then we run down the hill and we're like, "Hey, you're the bad guy."

And then they're like, "You better leave me alone."

And I'm like, "Okay, we'll leave you alone."

And then backstab, you're dead.

And then we go off and we're like, "Hey, here's the head of the demon."

And they're like, "Oh my God, thank you so much, adventurer.

Here's my cool shiny sword."

And then we kill him with the big shiny sword.

But first of all, it was an accident.

Was an accident?

He didn't mean to jump, was that all?

Because someone had to look in the burlap sack on the desk.

That was red.

And it means that's stealing.

And as soon as you steal, there's no like, this is the weird thing about the game.

As soon as you steal, there's no, "Hey man, don't do that.

Can you give that back?"

Only in certain occasions is it like that.

But if you steal and they go, "Oh, I don't like that."

They'll fight you to the death.

And then suddenly, it's for overpowered motherfuckers.

Chopping down like six or seven fucking NPCs that are just like, "Yeah!"

Either trying to run away for their lives or take you out.

And it's hilarious, it's funny.

It's so, it's so fucking funny.

I love this game.

And I'm really, seriously, we've just scratched the surface.

Oh, we have.

It's so good.

Someone was saying there's like 18,000 different possibilities of the ending or something like that.

Yeah, something like that.

18,000 different endings.

Yeah.

Like, what the fuck?

Pick an ending.

Yeah.

I wanted to pick an ending.

No, I don't.

I like it.

I'm like, surely it can't be that many.

It must be like such minor differences in how it ends.

You know what I mean?

Yeah, yeah.

Like, it can't be really detailed.

Really?

It's three different endings, but it all depends on what your characters are wearing.

And if you've got certain permeations on every single thing that happen.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm sure all three endings.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's just three endings.

Yeah.

With the fuckered, I don't have to calculate that.

I'm not good with math.

No.

It was a 9,000.

9,000?

No.

There we go.

9,000 different permeations of the three endings.

How are you talking about?

To make 18,000?

No, that's not it.

Six thousand, six thousand, six thousand times three is 18.

There we go.

Oh, my god, that's so funny.

Oh, dude.

What are you talking about?

Like, we've spent nearly 10 minutes just talking shit about us.

That's so funny.

If you haven't got it, watch a video about it because it is pretty fucking crazy.

Just watch your stream.

When you mean he wants to.

Yeah, that's when you can rewatch your stream.

You idiot.

Jump on my stream.

I'm going to be streaming pretty consistently with this game.

I would say, I would say every time that we're going to play it, besides tonight, because

we're going to play it a little bit tonight.

We're going to be streaming four of us.

Yeah.

And then it's going to be, you know, so jump on.

I am on YouTube.

I'm not on Twitch.

So if you're a follow-up on Twitch, jump onto the YouTube side.

It is still the same name, which played for kids.

You can find me live sporadically through the week because we don't know when we're all

sort of getting together.

It's four people trying to make schedules collide.

So we'll make it all work.

We'll make it all work.

But you know, that's why you turn on the notifications.

Yeah, turn the notifications on and then you'll be elated when he goes.

That's right.

If that isn't a plug, I don't know what is.

Blake.

Yeah.

How was your week?

It sounds like it was big.

Yeah.

It was pretty good.

Other than like dealing with COVID and stuff like that was shitty.

And then I have long COVID.

Oh, god damn it.

Yeah, you got the shit ends of it.

Yeah.

But excuse me, I can't believe that in the silence of you drinking.

I know.

And we're not in the same shit.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

That's why the cops are still in the last one, everyone said.

Yeah, I'll let it that out.

I'll let it that out.

Yeah.

I'm not doing it.

No, the dealing with COVID, which is not fun.

But on Thursday, we went to a wedding, right?

Yes, he did, yeah.

Yeah.

And we went to a little place called Malaney, Queensland.

Now I had never been there before.

It's lit.

Dude, I love Malaney.

Dude, it rocks.

Yeah.

I want to block the land up there.

100% 110% I want to go.

Yeah.

I don't know, block the land up there.

It is like the climate of Tasmania.

It's so nice.

Oh, it's like Mount Tango, sorry.

It's like Mount Tango.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's like that level.

Yeah.

Because it has coolness, it has like a tape and stuff like that.

It's not overly fucking hot.

It's rainforest.

It's rainforest, man.

It's so nice.

And it's just filled with old people, wineries and like cafes.

The random little tourist traps.

Yeah, dude, it's so nice.

Yeah, but it's like, it's an absolute destination.

Malaney is a fucking hot little spot.

And really close to like, oh, I want to go to Kalandra.

Oh, I want to go to like just the Maloola bar.

What are the main little fucking areas and the sunny coast?

You know, like Cippy Danes and chill like that.

Like you can just go and it's not that far away.

But Malaney, why would you fucking leave?

It's a beautiful rainforest.

Girl, wait, did you?

Just before--

I'm going to predict something.

I just want it to attempt to predict something.

The wedding that you went to was at a place called Flame Hill.

No.

Damn, all right.

[LAUGHTER]

It's the only one, or you know, that's it.

Well, I wasn't wondering.

It was a manor.

A manor?

Yeah.

Malaney manor.

OK.

Yeah, it is.

It is.

Yeah, bro.

It is--

And this is the thing, like I realized this pretty early on.

Like everyone else is like, oh, like can we do this?

Like can I park here?

Can I do it?

Like it says guest parking.

I think we can leave it here.

And I was like, this is Baz's manor.

Like this is-- so my friend Baz got married.

He's been on the show, but involved.

I think I've talked about him before.

Yeah, yeah, I was--

I was, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, my old boss.

So I went to his wedding.

And--

Yeah, very early on, I realized this is his manor.

This is like an Airbnb.

Oh, right.

OK.

He's rented the entire property and the services that

comes with it.

Yes.

Like, that's what he's done, right?

Because there was seven bedrooms there.

So--

Yeah.

I guess if you call a place a manor,

like it's pretty much a small castle.

Yeah.

It felt a bit like a compound, a little--

OK, I mean.

I was like, get it off.

Yeah, like sort of, sort of get it off.

Like it was-- it's just so tucked away from everything.

And it's down such a big drive and it's so secluded.

You can't see it from any public area.

All right.

So there's no way for you to really see the manor itself

like driving.

You can't drive anyone, is it?

That's excellent.

Yeah.

It is.

It's worth.

You can't hear the road from how far down you are as well.

Yeah.

Like, the fucking most fanciest shit I've ever been to.

That's brilliant.

That's no shit.

And the most big fanciest, expensive shit I'll ever

have been to.

So I think--

I don't think I'll get much more than that man.

Like, we can do--

That is like a good, a good years' worth of salary.

Like, not just for that, like for the whole winning.

Yeah, it's worth.

Yeah, yeah.

OK, fair enough.

But we're not going to limit ourselves.

We can do better than that.

But if I say, we can do better than that.

We can do it.

I reckon we can get out of it.

I don't think I would ever need to.

That was too much.

You're living in the lap of opulence and pure fucking decadence.

All right.

We can do it for a night, one day in the future.

Oh, yeah, one day.

We can do it.

Because obviously--

Yeah, you say like a year's wage or something like that's

like what's this?

80K, 60, 70K or something like that?

Yeah.

On a night, on a day and a night and sort of something like that.

Maybe they're there for the whole weekend.

Like, holy fucking shit, first of all, that's--

I think--

I think they were there.

I think they were only there for the one night.

Yeah.

OK.

Besides all the money, besides everything money--

who got really drunk?

Tell me more of the events of the wedding.

Obviously, I know like it's a wedding.

I didn't know that you were--

So this was the first--

Oh, dude, during the ceremony, holy shit.

No, man.

I fought back a coughing fit, right?

Well, just red herveils, right?

It was the strongest thing I've ever done in my entire life.

It was like--

It was so good.

It took so much willpower, right?

To hold back that fucking cough, man.

It was all you can think about.

Oh, there's this lenticle in my throat.

And I've got a--

I've got a lentil.

Yeah.

But were you doing little like--

No.

Not even once.

Wow.

Yeah.

And I'm right--

And pure will--

It's just purely breathed through my nose, right?

And--

Because I was--

I just started getting congested and shit.

Like the whole-- it was bad, but I could just breathe.

And it was just enough.

It was just enough for me to breathe through it.

Dude, it sucked.

Like--

I was like, like, as soon as that was done,

were you just like--

Yeah.

Just like let it out.

Yeah, pretty much.

As soon as everyone, like--

But it wasn't straightaway, like, you know,

we clapped as they walked past and stuff, like--

I don't think--

Yeah, I was like--

--coffee because you clapped me.

Like--

Yeah, and technically it was like--

Because I got to a point where I was able to sort of breathe

a bit more and whisper, without like, like, coffee--

I would cough if I spoke normally in a time shift.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So I got to that point.

And I was like, I was joking the whole time.

I was like, I was joking.

I was joking the whole fucking time.

And she's like, what?

I was like, yeah, she thought I was crying because my--

My friend--

No, I was like, I was like, I could breathe for shit.

Like--

I was like, yeah, that took everything in me to hold it back.

And then, yeah, they walked off and shit.

And I was like, [GASP]

God, my gut's out there.

And then instantly pounded three devies.

And they pulled me out of the trays.

I was like, double pissed and, like, double-park straight up.

And fucking, boom, don't need a one.

Put it down.

Another person walked past, grabbed another one.

Don't need a one.

And then I was like, all right, call an additional third.

And pretty much stopped there, to be honest.

I was better.

I didn't drink too much.

Like, you were asking about who got drunk, right?

I think I ended up having, like, maybe five or six

by the end of the night.

That was pretty good.

That was very tame.

Very tame.

I guess I had, like, many coffees.

Yeah, that's fair.

I had many coffees, just because they were really good.

So there was a barista--

Yeah, there was a barista.

And that was like super fucking creamy and frothy.

And like, yeah, very well made.

I was like, ooh, I'm going to drink these all night.

I'm just going to smash some caffeine, you know?

Yeah.

So I switched straight to--

Yeah, having lots of coffees, and they are lit.

And also my--

A good friend of mine.

We had a little--

Which is completely legal for me now.

But a little--

You know, a little--

A little cush?

Yeah, a little--

A little slide, you know?

Yeah.

A little full 20 blazer--

Fucking--

Weed, LaMail?

[LAUGHTER]

Well, man.

Yeah, it was fucking lit, man.

It was such a nice night.

It was the most--

Oh, dude, I have this image burned into my fucking brain.

Like, I am--

I was just like exploring, right?

And I saw Justin.

I was like, oh, hey, Justin.

[INAUDIBLE]

My interrupting, and we go, she's like, no, you're a little

awful.

I'm over there saying, hi, I'm like, hey, you doing?

Cool, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

All right, I'll leave you to it.

And then we fucked off.

And then as I fucked off, Baz opened up a door,

and he's like, where's my belt?

I was like, not like that, but like--

[LAUGHS]

This is like, because I'm like, oh, my belt,

my belt, my belt, please.

This is like, oh, hey, man, like, fucking come down.

Anyway, walked into his room.

And it was just like this giant open staircase.

And imagine, like, I'm going to say, like, six meters wide.

Like, six meters by six meters is how big the opening is.

For like, a square spiral staircase.

And it's like bedrooms lining the whole fucking way up,

so I type thing.

And then a giant loft, right?

All right.

Like I said, matter, it's ridiculous.

I think it was a seven bedroom, or eight bedroom, or something.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like, crazy manner.

But I walked into his bedroom.

And it was just like his fucking vest and jacket

and his like, cologne and watch and all this shit.

And just laid out.

And I was just like, bro, that's it.

It was like--

That is fucking--

I was like, man, if you're going for like fancy looks like no dollar,

you know, left--

I've spent everything I could type thing.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

What it looks like.

Yeah, right.

You know, OK.

I'm sure you could spend a whole lot more money than that easily,

right?

You're going to be fucking Prince of Dubai type shit, right?

I guess that's like some Android tape shit.

Billions of dollars on a watch type shit, right?

Like, yeah, you can get that.

But just in a vision of what that whole looks like,

that whole thing, like he nailed it, right?

Like, it fucking looked expensive, man.

Yeah.

And it was.

Like, his wedding room was like as much money as I spent on my whole wedding,

you know?

Fair enough.

You know what?

Good on him.

For-- he's living it.

He's living life the way he wants to live it.

And he's got a lot of money for that wedding, man.

And you know what?

He must be well within his reach.

If he's got like, say just the clothes.

Like, if you're looking at like expensive clothes and stuff like that,

and you're like, maybe that's a one-off sort of thing.

I don't know how much of jacket I'd ask.

It was real velvet, like--

You know what I mean?

Like, you go, OK, well, the clothes are expensive.

And then go, well, the wedding would be pretty expensive.

This place is pretty fucking-- and then you go, maybe this guy's just fucking rich.

[LAUGHTER]

Maybe this guy is just living like--

He's just super modest.

But he just riches now.

You know what I mean?

Like, those fucking--

What are those dudes that like worked from the age of 13 or something like that?

And they've saved 80% of their paycheck, like every day.

And then it's like, oh, yeah, I'm a millionaire by the age of like, fucking 18 or something like that.

Yeah.

That's sort of what it seems like with this man.

Yeah.

That's how he's--

Oh, there's cough in.

I fucking--

It's not coming through on the mic, so that's great.

Like, your noise suppression just cuts it right off.

Yeah, but that might be my discord one and not my--

Oh, my audacity, so--

Oh, well, I'm leaving it in.

Thanks.

You hear it now.

[LAUGHTER]

But, um, yeah, it was--

Yeah, it was.

It was wild, man.

And the food, the food was insane.

I didn't know what it was.

Any of it.

It just looked good and I ate it.

So wait, there wasn't like--

Oh, his chicken--

But they told us--

They like told us what it was.

Oh, the only thing 100% was like, oh, those are like chicken skewers, right?

And because one of our mates is allergic to peanuts, right?

He got them to make a full, like, nut free, like, you know--

Like a menu?

Yeah, like--

He changed.

Yeah, and he did something else.

I think it was no-- no shellfish.

Oh, no seafood at all.

I think it was no seafood, no nuts.

And he got them to make a fucking menu for that.

That's what I could say.

It was rare to do--

The food was so good, man.

Usually, like, any sort of, like, normal place where you go, OK, cool.

Well, here's the-- you know, there'll be like-- here's a function room.

And you would also do catering and drinks and stuff like that.

Catering options are chicken--

fish.

[LAUGHTER]

It's not like-- oh, yeah, we've made all these chicken skewers.

Also, we've made nut free chicken skewers because we had, like,

sarté and stuff like that.

We just unsartéed them.

And then we also made the fish menu without the fish.

Here you go.

Yeah.

But it was like just the--

it was five star quality food, for sure.

Yeah.

You know what I mean?

Like, just--

I just couldn't even fathom what I was eating.

Was it like--

It was like a silver sauce as well?

Like, what makes silver anable, dude?

Wait, what is it?

Taste like--

I don't know.

Good.

Don't say that.

I don't know.

I don't know what any of it tasted like--

The thing is, I suppose.

I cannot believe you.

You went to a place that had some of the fancier's opportunities.

And I hate saying this because I know it's like--

it's just opulence, right?

It's decadence.

It's beautiful.

Real.

You think about the art, artisanal--

no, that sounds fucking stupid, isn't it?

It's the art.

It's the art of using your money to create beautiful things.

You know what I mean?

And you go, well, this guy spent a whole heap of money

and got the best skilled people to make in cater--

fucking really cool food, right?

And they go, here's these tiny little fucking things.

And we made a silver sauce Blake, and you're just like--

[LAUGHS]

Yeah.

You got me in my way.

No, because they were like, what was it?

They didn't say.

Because they said this is the risotto dish.

This is the beef dish.

And then they like walked off.

And I was like, I don't know what anything else will be played is.

Bitch, that's silver.

Yeah, I was like, I don't know what anything else is.

And I asked the rest of the time, like,

I don't know what this fucking silver sauce is.

And they were like, no, couldn't tell you.

I was like, we're all leading it though.

It's silver.

It's straight up mercury, but--

I was like, you're going to die.

Where are you going to die?

And, um, yeah, so there was just some wild food, man.

And I got the beef.

Like, I was kind of with a fork.

Yeah.

I'm cutting it with a fork, man.

It was nice, it was delicious.

Oh, and I got--

I'm down with it.

I look both thin as--

because there was one girl on the table who went to her bed.

Because she was like, I'm feeling sick.

Like, I'm going to vomit.

She left.

Did he came out?

They let it go.

Like, till it was almost cold, right?

Like, it was very close to being cold.

And then they're like, I think it's too far.

Like, like, she's not going to eat it.

It doesn't even want it.

I was like, when in Rome, something I devoured it, right?

And it was.

It was at that point.

It was definitely at that point of life.

I can just imagine, like, you at the opposite end of the table

and just feel like, they're literally just talking to the guys

next door.

And just like, hey, she's not coming back.

We're just going to have to--

Excuse me?

Is she going to eat that?

And then you're just like climbing over the table and grabbed

this plate.

Like, I wish it was--

I wish it was like, obviously, like--

No, I didn't even notice because I was fucking gone

at that point, right?

Yeah.

Because it was until, like, eight the dinner.

I was like drinking heaps.

And then I ate and I was like, oh, I'm not

a fucking kickback.

But, like, after I ate, I was lit.

I was like, lit as hell.

And I didn't even notice that she had gone, right?

Like, I had fucking no idea that she even left.

She was like, two seats away from me.

No idea.

That'll happen.

Was it so-cure table?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

OK.

That's fair.

Fucking juice gone.

I was like, whatever.

And they would just like, like, you want this?

And I was like, oh, what?

Why?

And then, Ella's gone to bed.

She ain't coming back.

I was like, fuck, yeah.

She ain't coming back.

I was like, fuck, yeah.

To be out of it, right?

And then, like, an hour later, she came back.

She was like, oh, my food's still there.

I was like, dude, it was gone, like, so long ago.

It's like, so long ago.

Yeah, you should have taken that fucking gastro stuff,

fucking hours ago, you dig us.

That stuff's gone.

Yeah.

Yeah, some good food.

So, and I know they said, here's the beef one,

and here's the fish one, or chicken one,

or what, you're saying, like, beef and chicken.

OK, so beef and chicken, and you got to eat both the meals.

And I know, that's a thing.

This is what I meant about, like, the chicken and the mash.

I don't know if there was definitely mashed potato,

right?

That's fair, but they would have called it something fucking weird.

They get these.

No, they literally, they didn't.

They said, this is the chicken dish and the beef dish.

That's all they said.

No, yeah, yeah.

But they, the chicken, the chicken poultry, you know, beef,

fucking beef, right?

Fucking, they would have called the dish names.

They would have just gone to the table and be like,

these guys won't know any fucking dinner.

And it was the chicken beef.

There you go.

Yeah, of course they had a name.

They, we didn't get told what they wrote.

Yeah, they don't call mashed potatoes, fucking mashed potatoes.

They call it like, fucking deconstructed potatoes.

Deconstructed, I don't know the name of a potato with, you know,

fucking, I don't know the name of a potato.

Hey, where are you going with this?

That's the thing is, like, they, even if you were handed

the fucking beef dish first up, and then they go, tonight,

you'd be dining on fucking blah, blah, blah.

Here's a fucking word vomit.

Okay, no one cares.

No one cares.

Yes.

It's just eat it.

It's just fucking eat it.

Oh, what a taste of good.

It's exactly what it was.

It was like, you don't need to know what kind of beef it is.

This is what it is.

It's beef.

You don't need to know what kind of chicken it is.

Just eat it.

You know what?

It could have been Japanese wagging.

That would have been really fucking cool.

Could have been.

No, I don't.

But you might know, it doesn't matter.

It is still in your mouth.

It was, I know that the beef had roasted sweet potato.

Yeah.

And then it was like two green things.

It was like a green scooped thing.

And then there was another green thing, I kind of remember

what that was.

Bro, it was--

We spent 10 minutes talking about the food.

What else happened at this wedding?

What else happened at this fucking--

It was so tame.

You spent so much money on the bar tab.

And it only a few people got the lotto.

Yeah, right.

Is it expecting everyone to get trashed?

I don't know, man.

I just think the drinks were real-- $22 for a cocktail?

No.

For a cocktail, $22.

Did it have gold flakes in it?

No, it was just an espresso martini.

Fuck off.

No, get fuck.

$22 for an espresso martini.

That's what I said.

I was like, I'll just have the espresso, thanks.

[LAUGHTER]

Which is exactly what I started doing.

Yeah.

I just started drinking coffee instead.

Because it was free.

Yeah, fair enough.

It's just like, dude, I'm not spending $22 on a fucking drink.

But yeah, no.

It was not like, I spent--

I think we got back to the hotel at like 10, 10, 30?

Yep.

And then we just hung out with a couple of mommats who

were staying literally in the unit next to us.

We didn't exactly line it up.

It just sort of happened like that.

Just happened to be nice.

Yeah.

So that was it.

That was the end of the wedding, eh?

Yeah.

It was pretty lit.

I fucking dig it.

That's good.

Actually, you know what's wild?

Malayny fucking rocks.

I love Malayny.

So you did a wedding on Thursday?

I did a funeral on Thursday.

Oh.

What a wild difference.

It's the comedic difference.

Because, you know, I spent fucking three days doing drill

learning about the fucking guy.

I didn't know the guy personally at all.

I don't even think I'd actually physically

seen this person around the regiment.

And yet, I was one of the front members of the escort

party.

And I was--

I'm not even fucking artillery.

I'm a goddamn gun plumber.

I'm the wrong hat badge.

And I was like front and center for a lot of the shit.

And--

Just quickly.

How many people call them call what you do gun plumbers?

It's well known enough that if I say gun plumber,

they know I'm a fiddle.

Right.

Because to anyone--

I said that to Quincy, right?

Yeah.

And he was just like instantly looked at me.

He's like, what's your main thing?

This is like--

Yeah.

Zach.

He's like, Zachary, and then I--

I told him.

And he's just like, I know him very well.

I know, I know.

Yeah.

It's because-- damn it.

I can't hold back these cost-me-in.

No, I'm--

But I'm ripped.

[COUGHING]

Oh, you got it.

You got it.

You're fine.

Everything's fine.

But anyway, it was a good wedding.

I very much enjoyed it.

Very blessed to be invited to such a momentous stay

for this man and his wife.

And then I--

I fucking delicious meatball sub sandwich in the morning

for breakfast.

Very good.

Yeah.

It was fucking--

I love that place.

It just goes on forever.

Like the little town?

Yeah.

Dude, I could easily live in that town.

Easily.

It's nice to walk through.

It's weird--

So weird hill-oos.

And shall I let that--

No, fucking love that shit, man.

I want to get a block of land out there.

That's like, you know, 30 minutes drive or something.

You know, from that town, my line--

That have to be blocks out there, for sure.

I've already looked to the end.

There is.

And they're very expensive.

Oh, OK.

Yeah.

All right.

Very, very expensive.

All right.

Like millions of dollars.

Did they play any music at this wedding?

Oh, they did.

They did.

Yeah?

It was a good music.

It was a live performer, in fact.

Yeah, so they play any postmolone?

I think they did.

Actually, think that they did.

I think that he played better now.

[LAUGHTER]

What a horrible song to play.

No, but it was like one of his--

it wasn't an acoustic song.

Was it like a congratulations or fucking something?

Something else, I wonder?

He had changed.

One of them.

I was fucking lit for half the wedding.

Yeah.

And then I sort of sobered up in caffeine.

Yeah.

But yeah, anyway, he did.

He played music, pretty sure he played post.

This week, what will we listen to again?

No, you're supposed to say the thing, Blake.

Speaking of music, oh, we had already said that.

No, we didn't.

We always say it, though.

Fuck.

[LAUGHTER]

We start the podcast.

Yeah, you know, kind of that.

We'll start again.

We'll just cut this.

Yeah, fucking started again.

Speaking of music, like, this week, we

listen to Post Malone's breakout new fucking album.

He's just a starting starving new artist.

Austin.

Yeah, it's his first name.

I'm pretty sure he's got it tattooed on him somewhere,

so he remembers how to spell it.

Pretty sure he knows.

It's, can I just say the album name is Austin by Post Malone.

His name is Austin. Austin Post.

Austin Post Malone.

This album is a fucking 10.

That's it.

Cool.

It sounds a 10.

Next week.

I've got notes.

Man, you can take it.

You can take it.

If you want to talk about it and breed some of your notes,

my friend.

It's the garbage notes, really.

OK.

No, it's stuff like something real.

That fucking, that absolutely, it fucking hits.

The kicks through that whole thing and the chorus that

comes in like that.

That's absolutely beautiful.

Chemicals of fantastic pop song.

Yeah, it's just straight up pop song that is always

catchy.

Post Malone's pop songs are just fucking catchy.

Novi Candy has that fucking excellent,

synthy bass vibes.

I love the bass.

I love it.

The Ataway, it's on morning.

Fucking sick.

I actually really dig the Ataway to more.

It's so hard.

Sign me up.

Absolute, sign me up.

And I think it's bibaweb.

Bibaweb.

Those two songs that just sound like he was just sitting

in the studio with like a guy on a drums, guy on bass,

you know, she'll love that.

And he's just like, what is that?

This sort of feels right.

And they're just jamming.

They were just jamming and then they're like,

oh, let's run that back.

Let's do it again.

And then that was the take, you know what I mean?

And it's so fucking, this whole album,

I could honestly go on with just like,

besides Laugh it off.

Laugh it off.

The last song of the whole album,

the way it builds up and then just absolutely,

it fucking sent me man.

I was in like, I was in that,

I was in that like, I think I was sitting,

once I was sitting right here, but I had like my headphones on

and I was just like, oh, it's the end of the night.

Nothing sort of happened.

And I was just sitting here, listening to that song

and it came, you know, it came on, it gets all that's in it.

And I was just like, that is fucking beautiful.

Nice.

It was beautiful.

The whole album is so emotionally intelligent.

Yeah.

It's beautiful.

And it's best work.

I have to say it.

I would die, die, die, I, you because I think just

in recent interviews that I've seen of this guy, right?

Yeah.

He seems in a much better mental health,

sort of way.

And he seems good.

He has a kid, now he's a dad.

I think he actually might be enjoying life.

'Cause he's just disconnected himself

from Hollywood and all of that shit.

Yep.

And he's gone out.

Oh god damn it.

He's gone out to the middle of nowhere

and he just lives out there with his family now.

Yeah.

And he just does what he likes to do.

Yeah.

He's living his life.

Yeah.

And he goes, you know what I might do?

I might record another album and then just release it

and then I can continue living out here.

I can just do that.

That's what he probably wouldn't have

to release another album to continue living where he is living

for the rest of his life.

Yeah.

He's very easily--

He ends up in the gallery, dude.

I know.

And probably a Rolls Royce and fucking every other car.

But it's the thing of like, he would never get to that point

where he'd be like, all right, well, I now cannot live

within my means, sort of shit.

He is, besides all that, he's in such a place now.

Where he can create the music that he wants to create.

It doesn't sound like it's influenced by anyone.

Yeah.

It's just-- it's so--

I know, it sounds so fucking like, oh, love

fucking Post Malone dick.

But it's like, it's so nice and raw.

From the first track, man, I was like, oh, this is going

to be different.

Yeah.

And straightaway, I think I was into the third song.

I think that was--

it was like, whatever that third song, it's not chemical.

Maybe it is chemical.

And I was like, Kim, I fucking love this song.

I love this whole album.

I love this whole album already.

And I've done it the third song.

I know it's going to be fucking good.

And it did not disappoint.

It didn't let up.

And it was just beautiful the whole way through.

But that's the end of my rant.

I fucking love it.

That fucking lot.

That better words, I couldn't put any--

I couldn't put it any better, my friend.

I love it.

That's why I knew--

I was like, you know what?

You can take it, because I was like, you

will be able to say a bit of the night.

Bro, I fucking-- I think I said it before we started.

Like, this is another one of those albums where, like,

we'll listen to the next album of the week.

And I'll probably listen to that album once, maybe twice.

And then this is coming back on.

I'd probably agree.

It's coming back on.

It was like Tyler, the creator, the fucking--

the literal first fucking album that we listened to.

That stayed in my CD play for so long.

Yeah.

And then, yeah.

Yeah.

Another one of those albums.

Anyway, if that is--

I agree.

If that is not an endorsement to listen to this album,

it only came out in the 20th of July.

It is, as of right now, the 6th of August.

It has been out for, like, nine days, 10 days.

Yeah, some of them.

It's so fucking good people.

Yes, good.

Just take the--

what is it?

Like 40 minutes an hour to fucking listen to it.

Just give it a go.

Give-- give peace a chance.

[LAUGHTER]

Give Austin-- give Austin your love.

51 minutes and 40, 47 seconds.

51 minutes, 47 seconds, sitting down.

Oh, and this actually leads me into something

that I actually want to say.

OK.

Productivity is a great thing, right?

Sure.

It means we get to do more--

if you increase productivity, you get to do more in your day.

Yeah.

I say that is good up until a point.

OK.

Take time to relax, truly relax, and fucking, like,

just stop doing anything.

Don't look to relax to become more productive in the future.

That is all I'll say, because--

Don't what?

Don't look to be--

don't try to relax to be more productive in the future.

Don't look at it as a tool to be more productive.

Just relax for the sake of relaxing.

Do nothing for the sake of letting your mind be at peace.

OK.

That is all I'll say.

Because productivity is great.

It makes us do more.

If we increase it, we can fit more into our day.

There's only so much we can fit into our day

until we increase our stress levels right.

And then we get, like, a little burn out.

Burn out.

OK.

Decrease the burn outs.

Relax more.

Don't stress as much.

Chill out.

And this album really fucking brought it out to me.

Nice.

Yeah.

That's all I can say.

That's all I can really say about it.

Nice.

That's it.

That's it for me.

All right, I'm sorry.

Catch you later.

I'm still late.

No.

10 out of 10.

Next.

Yeah, happy with that?

10 out of 10.

Yeah.

10's.

10's across the board.

Yeah.

Dude.

But like, what do we do?

No, that's it.

You look like you're fading already, mate.

All right.

Do you have anything else to say about the album?

No, I just don't have anything else to say about it.

I'll give it a bit.

That's fair.

It's good.

Listen to it.

100%.

I endorse it.

It's awesome.

I'll tell people to say, "I'm so happy."

I endorse it.

I'll tell people to listen to it.

I'll be like, "Brite fucking.

Posties?

New album?

She's out."

She's out.

100%.

I can be trusted to endorse this.

Maybe.

No, my chair just sucks, dude.

I need a new chair.

It's okay.

Yeah, you got to get, like, a new.

Get, yeah.

Get a new office chair.

Yeah, I need a new chair.

One of those, like, in every office is in.

Yeah, just in a nice office chair.

Yeah.

Anyway, what are we listening to?

What are we listening to?

Blake, we know him.

This week, we get to absolutely treat ourselves.

It's something that we've been looking forward to for a while now.

Someone else.

One of our listeners.

Someone else.

Will absolutely spit shit when he fucking hears.

He'll hear the voice of God right now because this week we're listening to

the greatest hits of Creed.

[singing]

Right.

It's a bad idea.

It came on when we were driving, I think, back, really.

I think we were driving back from the wedding, maybe, because it was a nice drive.

We went out, the scene in way through S.

Yeah.

It's a cooler one, like fucking that direction.

Man, some nice country saw it out there, right?

Fucking big fan, man.

We were driving through, I don't remember, there was this, like, this beautiful little passage

that we were driving through.

Yeah.

And then it was like, "Mas, they're gross."

[singing]

I'm like, "God, God, they're in."

"They're in."

This is so lucky, man.

But, yeah, we listened to Creed.

I'm excited.

I like Creed.

It's the 2004 greatest hit album.

You can find it on Spotify.

It's a big compilation album.

It's got 13 songs, and it's only an hour long, and it starts off with "Torn."

And ends with the song called "Weathered."

And I don't think I've ever heard either of them, unless I have, and I just don't remember.

Yeah, I'm the same boy.

But, yeah, fucking, I'm very keen to listen to Creed, and thanks to Lats for constantly asking us,

on our voicemails about it.

Consistently.

Consistently, actually.

On for the one day.

Speaking of which, speaking of voicemails, we've got a singular voicemail for us to peruse.

Yes, for us to enjoy.

And what I'm going to do now is show it to you.

I'm going to give it to you.

I'm going to give it to you a raw.

That sounds horrible.

But that, with that feather of dude, he is...

I'm going to make sure that I have you'll say untandled.

Yeah, we good.

We good?

Yeah.

Yeah, but that feather of dude, this week's voicemail, we've only got one.

I think it won, and here it is.

Hey, bro, welcome to the channel.

Take away.

What can I get for you?

Hi, bro.

God damn it.

Hi, bro.

Why, no, you're not answer.

I don't know what this dude, that didn't zip.

What does he do this?

I don't even know who this is.

I think it's Jason, but at the same time, I also thought it was Lats, but I know it's not Lats.

Fuck you.

Beautiful.

Thank you very much.

Oh, God.

Valued voicemailers.

Slash listener.

You, your thoughts are with us.

Jesus Christ.

There's not much more we can do with that.

Bordering, but there's not even bordering on races.

Dude, dude, dude.

Unless he is actually a...

I'm pretty sure, maybe, I don't know.

But we don't know.

How about...

He could be super beat and lean.

Stop, stop, stop, stop.

It's going, man.

We got a cancel before we go.

Um, we're...

I didn't say that.

I think it's about right there that we wrap it up.

If you enjoyed listening to this podcast, make sure you hit us up on all of our socials

on Facebook, YouTube, the TikTok Instagram.

You can also, on this very episode right now, you can rate us, you can leave a comment,

you can follow, subscribe, likes, do all the buttons, make sure you hit the notification

and you are...

You were notified when we released our next episode, which is always at 9 o'clock

on the Thursday, 9 o'clock in the morning on the Thursday, uh, Australian Eastern Standard Time.

So, fucking...

You have no excuse.

Um, yeah.

You have no excuse.

I'm just going to pull this...

Most recent one because I was out of waiting.

Yeah, it just didn't work.

Yeah, yeah.

What, what, no.

It was all for the YouTube.

Yeah, that's fine.

That will happen.

Yeah, the YouTube is what it is.

I'm not even worried about it.

It's fine.

Maybe it's very nice.

Yeah.

It went up, went up, went up.

Speaking of YouTube, you can see more of Blake Bentley, uh, you can find him everywhere.

YouTube, TikTok, Instagram, where you can follow him on this gardening and fucking weight loss journey

where he's also, while he's not eating food, he's also grown food.

Yeah.

Well, I'm not eating it.

I'm just growing it.

Just growing it now.

And I see you went, like, you picked up like the radish sprouts.

You just like, I'm just like, he's like, little radish sprouts.

I was like, what's going on here?

You can find him at Blake_BentleyTV, uh, everywhere, just, just fucking find him.

Find him, give him a big ol' smooch on the list, uh, lips.

Um, you can also find him on Spotify at Blake Bentley, where he's got a fucking hit song, late night texting.

Um, and if you want to see more, it's a good song.

I love it.

That's fucking fantastic.

It's very nice.

I love it.

If you want to see more of this face, uh, with the nice, shaved head, uh, you can find me at

Switch Blades for Kids All One Word Everywhere on Anything.

Uh, and especially on YouTube in the upcoming days where I'll be streaming, uh, myself and

yours truly, Blake Bentley, uh, playing Bouders Gate 3 with, uh, two other friends, uh,

Daz and I can't remember the other guy's name.

Tim.

No brother or no.

Daz and Tim.

There you go.

Um, so make sure you jump in there and say good A and, uh, leave, leave a comment, leave a like,

send a video to someone that you love.

Um, that's a weird thing to say.

I'll also have a Spotify.

[Laughter]

I'll also make music so you can check that out on Spotify as well.

This is the exact same name.

It's all One Word Switch Blades for Kids.

Um, once again, guys, Blake, do you have any other final messages for the viewers?

I don't think so.

Thank you, yes.

Um, guys, thank you again.

Uh, we love yous and, uh, we're going to be playing us on for you right now.

We will also see you next Thursday.

Bye.

Bye now.

Bye bye.

I was just watching this all happen.

You know, I'm just staying, I'm just the witness to this action right now.

I love to know the right.

I'm so glad.

I love to know.

[Music]

I remember this.

I'm from the room to the screen to show you the battle that he tells.

[Music]

But you know,

it's trying to persuade the press, but

you should do this, you should help to impress him.

Next time, I'll be on for you.

[Music]

[BLANK_AUDIO]

A Wedding and a Funeral (Post Malone AOTW)

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